As my son approaches his 2nd week birthday, I find that I have a renewed interest in shit. And I don’t mean shit as in stuff, I mean shit as in poo. Because Luke is a precious reminder that even though we people have all this specialized useful equipment - hands and eyes and brains and legs - we are all really just tubes that need stuff to go in one end so that stuff can come out the other.

Luke doesn’t have a job yet, and spends all day manufacturing and producing a cornucopia of squirty yellow substances that fill his diapers. On the other hand, I have a job manufacturing product specifications that clutter people’s inboxes, but not much in the way of poo.

Poo Price the internet poo pricing calculator: “Pricing poo since 2002.” Does a decent job of calculating in currency, how much your poo is worth, but I think it would be more useful to calculate how much your job is worth in poos.

“How was your day, honey?”

“Terrific, a real 5-shitter!”